Sex & Body Works

Wheel of Foreplay

For couples apart or together and for those on their own. 

People can pick from an ever-growing (ahem) virtual deck of categories detailing themes like the physical-oriented "Push It Real Good," the more cerebral "Cosmic Connection," the "Some Like It Hot" selection, which apparently "feeds sensual connection," and a lot more. 

Click the image to learn more.

By Scout Cook

Oh, my LAB family. If I had known that all of the sexual knowledge I’ve amassed over the past decade would be used to help you all get off in the middle of a pandemic, I may have spared my mother the explicitly open conversations I’ve put her through about my sex life. But alas, we are all here for better or worse, and there are enough of you who either don’t know me at all or only know me as an adult that this isn’t TOO weird.

I’ll start this rodeo by disclaiming that out of my friends, I am far from the kinkiest. I am relatively vanilla in comparison. I also constantly struggle with a once volcanic libido now struggling to come out of a trauma-induced dormancy (with no help from my anti-depressants, natch). But maybe that’s why I’m the one to write this guide — there will be no pretense of simplicity, I will not feign sexual confidence. I’m not a sex god, I’m just a person. I put my latex suit on one limb at a time just like everyone else. But if some of the knowledge I have helps you get off tonight, I can sleep well. I’ll include some links as I have a limited word count and cannot explain everything.

I know many of you aren’t isolating with someone else, or maybe you’re isolating but only with roommates, so being sexual with another person seems far-fetched and difficult. Well, with the internet, that’s no longer a roadblock. Do you have a partner that you would normally see before quarantining? Do you have any device with a camera on it and access to internet? Well, fuck away my friends! Phone sex is as old as a the phone and a reliable connection itself. I often find that people shy away from going all-in with phone sex out of fear of looking silly, but most of you reading this are theater people! You KNOW that, in order to reach success, you have to embrace the fear of looking like an idiot. There’s a reason porn is so funny to watch when you’re not horny: Sex is ALWAYS ridiculous! Once you get past that, you can start to become and feel like your sexiest self, and phone sex is the best way to dip your toes in the water. Be creative, ask what they’d like you to do to them and tell them what you would like them to do to you. Masturbate with each other from miles away!

Something that can help with that is the incorporation of toys into your sexual routine, solo or otherwise - and all genders are welcome to try any of them. Toys are a great way to explore your turn-ons. There are so many dildos, vibrators, vibrating underwear inserts, fleshlights, clone-a-willies, and so many other sex toys and accessories that are just a click away! Miss sucking dick or eating pussy? Just order a dildo or fleshlight to keep those skills fresh! They even have rabbit vibrators, which have a little attachment to pleasure your clitoris as you use the dildo on yourself. It can feel embarrassing at first - and very weird - to explore yourself with toys. It’s definitely harder to go as fast as lovers in heat (especially if you, like me, have arthritic ass hands and wrists), but maybe you’ll find a slower way that you like it. If you just like it fast and hard, there are plenty of special accessories that help provide that!

To those of you lucky enough to be self isolating with a partner, I highly recommend letting them play with you using the toy. It’s a whole new takeover of sexy, steamy power to allow someone to fuck you with something other than themself. You may decide to buy bondage restraints afterwards to fully take yourself to the next level of submissive, giving your partner complete control (within boundaries — always set boundaries and safe words before sex, and ALWAYS ask “Is this okay?”, it’s really hot when someone cares about your wellbeing). When buying bondage restraints, NEVER GO FOR COP CUFFS! They can really hurt your skin and cut off circulation. Leather or faux-leather cuffs are good options that are comfy for the submissive, but (seeing as you have the time for it) try learning how to do Shibari rope bondage! When done right, it’s restrictive in just the right way to keep you from moving but still comfortable. Plus - leather cuffs and rope bondage look WAY cooler for your Coronavirus Instagram feed!

I was going to write about anal sex as well, but I simply don’t have the space to do so properly. Alternatively, here is an article on it from Teen Vogue (well done, I might add) and here is an awesome article on why straight cis men should try their hand at assplay as a bottom. Seriously, cishet men - it’s past time you started learning more about your assholes.

The trickiest thing to talk about, in my opinion, is porn. We all watch it, but how much do we know about the industry? While big porn sites like the Pornhub community are easily accessible and trying to raise awareness about the sex industry itself, unless you pay for a premium membership these people aren’t getting properly paid for their work (and even with the premium membership, I’m not quiet sure how helpful that is). There’s a lot of great, indie porn out there! Yes, you may have to buy or purchase access to webcamming, or a fully produced film, but again: You are mostly theater people! You of all people should understand how difficult it is to be in the entertainment industry and make a profit! And because they’re part of the sexual entertainment industry, they’re even more marginalized and find it harder to get work. So please, if you’re watching porn, consider the following:

• Donate what you can to any/all crowdfunding for sex workers (which includes cam girls, porn actors, full-service sex workers, strippers, etc) as most unemployment laws prohibit them from collecting unemployment, even in the case of legal sex work.

• Do the research to find a good independent porn maker and pay them for the work they do!

As I draw this article to a close, please remember that sex is about feeling good. If anything I suggested doesn’t feel good to you, you’re not wrong or too boring. We all have our preferences and tastes. But I implore you to try something new during this pandemic. Maybe it brings you closer together with your partner, maybe it brings you closer to yourself. Maybe you’ll try things you never knew you’d love! So add Sasha Grey’s The Juliette Society trilogy to your quarantine book list and make those apartment windows STEAMY! But please practice safe sex if you’re having it, we don’t need more Capricorns.